MySpace.com - Ms. Amanda Jayne : The Mayercraft Baby

THE MAYERCRAFT BABY

It is about time that I told you all a little about my trip. For starters, what is the Mayercraft? John Mayer hosted a musical cruise to the Bahamas and I went on it. It sailed from Miami to Freeport and back. For anyone who knows I am not a fan of Miami. I find the people to be rude. The men rude, the people rude. Perhaps the fried shit in the cuban food makes people edgy. I know, its the fucking humidity.

So the boat... I shall begin with we were on the Carnival Victory. I have never cruised but I was a bit paranoid. Alright, I watched Titanic and Poseidon before I left. I know the boat would never hit an iceberg in the caribbean but a rogue wave to flip the boat over, duh. I was paniclaidened during the safety drill. It gave me bad anxiety to have the life jacket on... At least i could let go of John and watch his body sink to the bottom as the life boat comes to rescue me to the Carpathia... Oh wait, bad dream. It was a dream I had the night before (yes only two hours of sleep thanks to some major fat bitches who didnt pay their way.)

The food was eh. The dining room kicked ass as i loved our servers Jin night one and night three Juan. The other man on night two had the odacity to give me lip when i wanted another lobster tail and shrimp. We did meet cool people such as Melo and his wife from Vegas. Cant remember her name. And Big John who gave me a half bottle of Petron. Speaking of Petron, thanks Tony Held for Ginell's shot. Number 8 hit alot. Thanks to Barry for my drinks. If you didn't you can do it next year.

So John has alot of fat fans. Alot of fans with bad attitude one called me an annoying bitch. Ugly cunt. Some gals, now I am a big gal, even wore bikinis. Gee wanna scare John. But he had his moment... Borat swimsuit. Thank god I didnt see it. I would have thrown up. His fans were rude, kinda ruined it. Leave him alone! I never saw john other than the times we were supposed to. (The local Q and A and the shows). I was bummed because i was the last question at the q and A. I wanted to know his plans for the trio... But people had lame as questions like about his bucket list and shit. Fuck you eat a hot pocket.

I love Sherrod... I crouching tigered him and he gave me points because I suggested he come back in another life as JM with a bigger dick.

Bob reynolds is amazing and his keyboarder and drummer rule.

DRH. DRH. DRH.

Ok so for those who know me, i love SOMETHINGS MISSING... He played it... YEAH THE SHOW I DIDNT GO TO...SIGH SLIT MY WRIST But this... made up for it... Can I lick him please? I had to take a fully clothed shower after.

It was a great time. Good times. I love hot pockets. I love John. Ginell and Chad are gonna make babies. John does like em yellow. I called it.

Now I did see John. The airport. Close to the grey sweat pants NO MAKEUP. So no brows. He ran into me. Helped me up and I am in awe. He said it was good to see me again. And that I looked different... He got it.. not the brows but that I had "lost a significant amount of weight" and looked good.

Dreamy sigh. the boat never flipped open but he knew the way out.

By the time I recognize this moment, this moment will be gone... Thats the way this wheel keeps working now.

Chips ahoy! See you next year.